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  • Why are you so irrational?

    How many times have you heard that, or even said it to others, in times of disagreement? Or its close relative, “Why can’t you just be normal”?

    But what is rational or normal? We might assume it’s the most reasonable behavior, attitude, action etc that would be chosen by a computer – or even Star Trek’s Mr. Spock – given all available information about the situation. But it isn’t that simple. Sure, computers can make decisions given a set of inputs – however, they only base their decisions upon the program their running. Switch the program and the decision comes out different!

    In reality there’s no such thing as normal or rational. Only what’s right for you. And since you’re a unique individual that’s likely to be different to what’s right for someone else.

    So what makes our individuality? It’s a mixture of hard-wiring (genetics or how we’re born) and upbringing (the environment in which we grew up). That said, our character never stops being made, we are affected by every experience throughout our lives. Usually these later experiences have an ever-so-subtle effect, but dramatic events can have a major influence, eg bereavement, being let down by someone you trusted completely…

    Spirit individuates in physical form in order to broaden its experience. Everyone’s basic character is determined (by them) before they are born. And everyone is different because if we were all the same life would be pointless. Experience comes only from the infinite variations arising from the interactions between diverse players.

    The problem is that society has developed in such a way that sameness is valued more than difference. It pressures everyone to conform to the norm,  to buy the latest fashions or little plastic gadgets, to behave rationally.

    Stop beating yourself up if you happen to think / act a little differently to the crowd. Don’t try to be what you’re not, be proud of who you are. And once you’re able to respect yourself, extend it to others. Never condemn anyone for not being rational or normal or not matching your particular view of how they ought to be. The world’s big enough for us all, and all the better for our differences.

  • Judgment

    “Judge not lest you be judged” said Lord Jesus, along with, “Let him who is without sin cast the first stone.”

    These two admonitions are among the most quoted but least heeded of the great Master’s teachings.

    We inhabit a culture of blame. When something goes wrong, as it inevitably does in this flawed realm, we immediately seek the villain / culprit / scapegoat to demonize. As though by framing another we somehow absolve ourselves from any responsibility.

    Human society revolves around evermore complex laws. No doubt these have their origins in the noble aim of protecting individuals from one another and creating a secure environment where each is encouraged to perform to their best in the knowledge they shall be able to enjoy the fruits of their endeavors.

    Indeed there should be disincentives for willfully destructive behavior, and individuals should accept responsibility for the consequences of their actions. Where one wrongs another so the wrongdoer should compensate the wronged. But that should be that. Today’s judgment obsession has become an out-of-control monster that frequently holds back progress.

    Some religious extremists teach that those who sin shall burn in hell for all eternity. This is not so. God (or Spirit) does not judge, in seeking to punish. God only evaluates in order to further our evolution. The lessons we fail, ie our errors and “sins”, must be re-taken, or re-presented in a different way. God does not seek retribution, for not only are we of God, but we each of us are part of God. And why would God to harm His very self…

    We are born to experience, we live to learn. We are imperfect. We make mistakes as we go, as do others. But mistakes, and misfortunes, are the very source of our learning and growth.

    When something goes wrong, instead of making blame and retribution the priority, wouldn’t we be better asking what can be learned? How can we do better next time? Rather than focusing on who should be hung out to dry.

    The other side of the judgment coin is forgiveness. And the Lord’s Prayer admonishes: “forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us”. Easy words, but true forgiveness is just about the hardest thing to do. The great tragedy is that failure to forgive harms us at least as much as it does the object of our grudge. If you can’t forgive, seek at least to let go that which is passed.

    We all have rights; the right to exist, the right to fulfill our potential, the right to happiness… We naturally feel aggrieved when those rights are impeded. And it’s OK to fight for those rights. But don’t let the judgment of others become an obsession for it’s own sake.

  • What is Spiritualism?

    In a nutshell, Spiritualism is the belief (or to Spiritualists, the knowledge) that individual consciousness survives the death of the physical body and, under certain circumstances, is able to communicate with those who remain physically alive.

    Although often credited to Emanuel Swedenborg, Spiritualism took off in 1848 when sisters Kate and Margaret Fox of Hydesville New York began to experience rappings that were attributed to the Spirit of a murdered peddler. Though debate continues as to the authenticity of the Fox sisters’ phenomena, the momentum started by their “experiences” created a worldwide movement that continues to this day. (more…)

  • Why Life Sucks

    Why does life suck? This is a question many of us ask at some time or another. Actually life doesn’t really suck, but it can certainly feel that way sometimes.

    Wouldn’t it be great if everything ran smooth all the time, from the moment we wake up to the moment we go to bed? Wouldn’t it be great to land our dream job, doing what we love and large paycheck to boot? Wouldn’t it be great if all our relationships ran smoothly, if our partner understood and respected our innermost feelings?

    In fact, it wouldn’t be so great at all. It might be nice for a little while, but pretty soon it would feel dull as dishwater. What’s more, we wouldn’t be fulfilling our true purpose in being born into this world, ie to learn and grow.

    Many Spiritual philosophies tell that we choose our life path and lessons to be learned before we are born. Though we have free will on earth the choices we made appear throughout our lives.

    It’s true; some people have harder lives than others. But that is because they chose to experience those things.

    Why would anyone choose hardship? Because in facing, defying, and overcoming adversity we gain much more experience than we ever could from plain sailing. Life is short – just think of a human lifespan compared to the age of the earth. When we eventually return home it isn’t the inflated bank account, big houses and flashy cars that we carry with us. It is the lessons we learned throughout the adventure of incarnation.

    Keeping the above in mind will give you the strength to keep going through the dark days when life really does appear to suck.

    Perhaps it’s an issue of self-esteem. You’ve done something you feel bad about. Rest assured, to be human is to err. We’ve all done things that with the benefit of hindsight we wouldn’t have done. None of us can reverse time. But we can resolve to do more right than wrong, more good than harm in future. And that is our raison d’etre, our purpose to not only continue but continue full speed ahead rather than decrying life’s hardships. If we are here it is because we, and Spirit (God) have chosen that we are here and we have a duty to make the best of what is really a golden opportunity.

    Human nature is such that we tend to notice only those things that trouble us or fail to meet our approval. How often do we wake in the morning and appreciate how good we feel? Probably not often enough. But if we happen to feel slightly under the weather we notice it like hell. If a business or service falls short of our expectations we are quick to complain, but how many of us bother to show our appreciation for a job well done? It’s just the way we are.

    It may be a cliché, but counting your blessings really can really be an eye opener when life seems to suck. Sit down somewhere quiet, pour yourself a drink and put on your favorite music. Now write down what’s troubling you. Then take a new sheet of paper and write down all the positives in our life. You should find there are many more positives than negatives. Look again at your troubles and it should be easier to find solutions, or at least appropriate courses of action, for each of them.

  • Inspiration Quotes, Wisdom Quotes

    Life can be a wonderfully exciting adventure. It can also at times seem unbearably difficult. Just remember, without problems we cannot learn, and we could never really appreciate the good times without the less good.

    Here are some words of inspiration that embody true wisdom of the highest order. Allow them to elevate you to greater heights, or simply to shed a little light in your darker moments…

    Judge not, that you be not judged.
    For with the judgment that you pronounce you will be judged,
    And the measure you give will be the measure you get.
    Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye,
    But do not notice the log that is in your own eye?
    Or how can you say to your brother,
    “Let me take the speck out of your eye,”
    When there is the log in your own eye?
    You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye,
    And then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.
    —- Lord Jesus

    Never judge a man
    Until you have walked a mile in his moccasins
    —- Traditional Native American Indian

    Just enjoy the moment of now
    Neither the past or the future exists
    Only now

    Live not for tomorrow
    Yearn not for the past
    Live only for the moment
    It’s all that is ours

    If good luck is not yours
    It is someone else’s
    Do not be angry or nasty
    But be nice to them
    Because one day you shall have good luck
    And you wouldn’t like it
    If they were angry and nasty
    —- Ayano (8)

    There are no mistakes, only lessons. There is no failure, only experience.

    Whether you believe you can,
    Or believe you can’t,
    You are right
    —- Henry Ford

    Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe,
    It can achieve
    —- W. Clement Stone

    If you don’t try, you cannot succeed
    If you try, you might succeed
    And will certainly achieve more
    Than if you hadn’t tried

    Don’t seek perfection
    Seek understanding, experience, and growth

    This above all
    To thine own self be true
    —- William Shakespeare

    We are all in the gutter
    But some of us are looking at the stars
    —- Oscar Wilde

  • O Love That Will Not Let Me Go

    I must have sung this piece a hundred times at Spiritualist church without ever pondering its significance, though I had noticed it was a little different and more poignant that the standard Christian hymn. But last week, after a difficult period that had caused me to question myself intensely, I found the service, and particularly this song, especially thouht-provoking. Inspired to review the lyrics at leisure I did some searching on the Web and discovered it was written by George Matheson, a blind Scottish priest, at a time of intense mental anguish. It is said Matheson was inspired to write it in just five minutes.

    Although ostensibly sad, Matheson appears to be describing his own passing, I interpret it as a message of comfort and optimism. However hard this life seems at times, however great a significance we place upon it, in reality we are all part of some infinitely greater whole to which we shall return, both enriching and being enriched by that universal oneness that we might call Spirit or God. Life is thus but a single step along an endless path.

    The message is not an excuse to take life lightly, Matheson himself overcame the severe handicap of blindness to enter the ministry, rather it is that having done our best we need not beat ourselves up knowing that our experiences great or small shall some day all be absorbed back into the source of all things.

    O Love that wilt not let me go,
    I rest my weary soul in thee;
    I give thee back the life I owe,
    That in thine ocean depths its flow
    May richer, fuller be.

    O light that followest all my way,
    I yield my flickering torch to thee;
    My heart restores its borrowed ray,
    That in thy sunshine’s blaze its day
    May brighter, fairer be.

    O Joy that seekest me through pain,
    I cannot close my heart to thee;
    I trace the rainbow through the rain,
    And feel the promise is not vain,
    That morn shall tearless be.

    O Cross that liftest up my head,
    I dare not ask to fly from thee;
    I lay in dust life’s glory dead,
    And from the ground there blossoms red
    Life that shall endless be.

    This beautiful rendition is by David Phelps, courtesy youtube.com

  • Einstein and Spirituality

    Albert Einstein (1879-1955) is widely regarded as one of the greatest scientific geniuses of all time. His theories of special and general relativity cast doubt upon the nature of reality perceived by the senses, opening the door to a far more mysterious universe than ever previously imagined.

    On a darker note, lifelong pacifist Einstein’s work provided the foundation for the development of the atomic bomb, and fearful that Germany would develop such a weapon, he wrote to US President Roosevelt urging him to take the lead in this endeavour. Einstein later regretted this letter and committed himself to nuclear disarmament.

    This reading presents some quotations from Einstein demonstrating a broader, Spiritual, wisdom:

    Albert Einstein“I want to know God’s thoughts; the rest are details.”

    “Any intelligent fool can make things bigger, more complex, and more violent. It takes a touch of genius — and a lot of courage — to move in the opposite direction.”

    “Imagination is more important than knowledge.”

    “Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.”

    “The only real valuable thing is intuition.”

    “A person starts to live when he can live outside himself.”

    “I am convinced that He (God) does not play dice.”

    “God is subtle but he is not malicious.”

    “Science without religion is lame. Religion without science is blind.”

    “Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.”

    “Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.”

    “Technological progress is like an axe in the hands of a pathological criminal.”

    “Peace cannot be kept by force. It can only be achieved by understanding.”

    “My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind.”

    “Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocrities. The latter cannot understand it when a man does not thoughtlessly submit to hereditary prejudices but honestly and courageously uses his intelligence.”

    “The release of atom power has changed everything except our way of thinking…the solution to this problem lies in the heart of mankind. If only I had known, I should have become a watchmaker.”

    “Heroism on command, senseless violence, and all the loathsome nonsense that goes by the name of patriotism — how passionately I hate them!”

    “He who joyfully marches to music rank and file, has already earned my contempt. He has been given a large brain by mistake, since for him the spinal cord would surely suffice. This disgrace to civilization should be done away with at once. Heroism at command, how violently I hate all this, how despicable and ignoble war is; I would rather be torn to shreds than be a part of so base an action. It is my conviction that killing under the cloak of war is nothing but an act of murder.”

    “A human being is a part of a whole, called by us _universe_, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest… a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.”

  • Just Do It!

    John Greenleaf Whittier said: “For of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these: ‘It might have been!’”

    There are two kinds of regret, regret for things you’ve done, and regret for things you haven’t. By far the worse is the regret for opportunities missed.

    We only get one crack at life, in our present body and circumstances anyhow. Though possessed of free will we almost carry a God-given duty to make the best of our time on earth. No matter how rich or powerful they may be, nobody gets the chance to re-live time.

    I always remember my father speaking of the things he wanted to achieve. Though he led a full life, many remained undone when he was eventually overtaken by illness and passed away. Perhaps if, instead of procrastination, he’d just gone out and done them his life would have been that bit fuller still…

    It can be tempting to follow the safety and security of the well-trodden path, inactivity is easier than action and no one ever got fired for buying IBM and all that. Building dreams is a noble endeavor, but if they remain idle fantasy then they are nothing but costly distraction. By never venturing out of one’s comfort zone, how much potential experience do we miss?

    Sure, risks and adventures can go “wrong”. But equally surely no adventure ever leaves its participants untouched by experience. And isn’t that why we’re all here, to experience, learn and grow.

    I’m not advocating impulsive, random behavior – though even that has its place in experience accumulation. What I’m saying is that after making a choice – with one’s heart and head – we must then take the plunge and carry it out. For whatever we find through the doors of choice our wealth of experience will certainly grow.

  • Jung’s Four Functions

    Revolutionary psychologist Carl Jung suggested that in addition to extraversion/introversion we have four ways of functioning – sensing, intuiting, thinking and feeling. For each of us one of these is dominant. Jung’s classifications form the basis of the Myers Briggs Type Indicator, one of the most widely used contemporary schemes of personality assessment.

    Just as we sit somewhere on an introversion-extraversion spectrum, so sensing and intuiting, and thinking and feeling also form ranges along which we are situated. The sensing-intuition range is about how we obtain information, whereas thinking feeling describes how we process it.

    Sensing types give most weight to what they actually experience (through the senses). Facts, data, and detail form their guiding principles. They are life’s skeptics. Seeing is believing, and if they can’t see they don’t believe.

    Intuitives are more open to exploring ideas mentally. They are more concerned with the big picture than the minutiae. Intuition can also be thought of as the little voice within, that which tells you something is right even without, or in contradiction to, conscious analysis. It is the function of psychic awareness and mediumship; that which is closest to our Spiritual essence.

    Feeling types will weigh information, making choices that give a greater internal harmony or satisfaction, ie which feel better. They may visualize themselves in various situations.

    Thinkers apply logical analysis to the information at their disposal. They may apply numeric values and try to assess the probabilities of possible outcomes, eg the best case, worst case, and most likely scenarios.

    All of the functions have a place in our being, and we should be able to use each when most appropriate, though we tend to have a preference for one (maybe two). But our prime function(s) can change over time, and according to circumstance. For example a normally logical, thinking type may fall back on emotion when under pressure and unable to analyze rationally.

    The function that tends to be most under-developed in many is intuition, science favors that which can be measured and observed, and yet the Spiritually aware know that is but a small fraction of existent reality. And yet, unless highly developed (to a degree unattainable in a single lifespan) intuition alone is insufficient to survive and thrive and make the best of our time on the earth plane.

    The most dangerous function is feeling, causing us to cast reason aside and doubt what reason says is right. It sacrifices long-term gain for short-lived gratification. And yet, even often-irrational feeling has its place in the equation, operating as a fallback when rationality is inconclusive.

    What type(s) are you and why does it matter?

    There are numerous personality tests available for free on the Web. These will give an indication of your primary function(s). Take a few as they may give different results. And accept only those results that agree with your instinctive self-analysis. For example:
    http://www.similarminds.com/
    http://www.humanmetrics.com/

    Self knowledge is valuable because the human mind is fundamentally lazy. Once we settle into a function, either by birth or experience, the mind prefers running those same programs again and again without having to deviate from its algorithmic responses. Just think how much we operate on autopilot, we can go entire days without need for conscious intervention of the will.

    But this isn’t necessarily living to our highest potential. By knowing our inherent traits we can watch for their influence, and question the direction they drive us in. Perhaps we shall still choose that direction, but it will at least be a conscious choice.

  • The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

    The 7 Habits of Highly Effective PeopleFirst published in 1989 Stephen R. Covey’s The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People has become one of the best-selling and most influential self help books of all time.

    Covey, an international organizational and leadership consultant, clearly knows his stuff and bases his 7 habits well-researched, tried and tested principles. 7 Habits is easy to read with numerous practical examples of the application of the habits interspersed among their descriptions and theoretical justification.

    At times the reader can feel just a little relieved that Covey isn’t their father as he describes holding family council meetings with the family mission statement pinned to the wall!

    In brief the 7 habits are:

    1 Be Proactive. We each have a circle of concern (things that matter to us) and a circle of influence (things we can change). Since we can only have an impact within our circle of influence, this is where we ought to direct our efforts and energies. As we take control where we can so our circle of influence expands.

    2 Begin with the End in Mind. Leadership is identifying where you want to go, management is the process of getting there. Without leadership, management is useless. This habit guides you through identifying your center towards the creation of a personal mission statement that will provide the guiding principles of all you do.

    3 Put First Things First is concerned with time management. It defines the 4 quadrants of urgency and importance and advocates a shift of effort from quadrant 1 (important and urgent) quadrant 3 (urgent but not important) activities to quadrant 2 (important but not urgent) in order to increase effectiveness. Doing so will reduce the pressures that arise when important things become urgent.

    4 Think Win/Win. There are various paradigms of human interaction, but one should always seek a mutually beneficial outcome.

    5 Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood. Effective communication begins with empathic listening, this is not just listening to the other’s words, but seeking to place yourself in their position, feeling how they feel.

    6 Synergize. The hardest, but potentially most productive of the habits, and the culmination of all the others. Synergy is where 2 or more individuals come together to produce results exceeding the sum of the individual parts.

    7 Sharpen the Saw. To keep being effective you need to stay refreshed in the four dimensions of the physical, mental, social/emotional and physical.

    Habits 1-3 are internal and are grouped under the heading “Private Victory” and reflect the fact that you must first change yourself before you can hope to change the world. Habits 4-6, “Public Victory,” turn the improved you towards the world.

    As with all books of this kind, 7 Habits should be read with an opened mind. Not every facet of every habit will apply to every reader, but all are food for thought, and should you choose to ignore any at least it will be a conscious and reasoned decision and not due to ignorance of the principle’s existence.