How to Stop Feeling Bad

It seems the majority of people suffer some form of stress, depression, or anxiety at some time or another. But what are the causes, and what can we do to improve matters?

We can feel bad for various reasons:

the past
yourself
your circumstances/situation
future worries
world problems

Let's consider each in turn

The past

What's gone is gone and can't be changed. If you've learned from it - great! All that matters is what you do from here on in - because that's all you CAN alter. If you've made mistakes, join the club; everyone makes mistakes, that's how we learn. As Jesus so wisely said: "let he who is without sin cast the first stone." That rules us all out.

Unless we never take action or suffer some psychopathic disorder, guilt is part of our being. As humans we are inevitably flawed. Invested with free will we inevitably act in less than perfect ways that later lead to regret and guilt.

Perhaps you've done some harm by your actions. If you feel bad about it, that's good, it means you have a conscience. But rather than feeling bad, find a way to make amends, to do something positive. Beating yourself up about what you've got wrong can't undo it one iota, but it does keep you from doing your best now!

Yourself

You're amazing, you're unique, and no one in the whole world has ever been like you. Sure, you have negative qualities, just as you have positives. The trouble with human nature is the tendency to focus on the negatives, and to compare ourselves unfavorably with others. Stop!

If you take the time to think about it you will find plenty of good things about yourself. The journey of self-knowledge is a lifelong one, but undoubtedly one of self-empowerment. Identify your strengths, and leverage them. Focus your energy on those things you do best and you will fulfill your life's potential. Be proud of what you are. Love yourself.

Circumstances

Like a game of poker we're all dealt a different hand of cards. Similarly we all have the power to play our hand as best we can.

Society is materialistic. We are bombarded by overt and covert messages that success is measured by our house, car, clothes, bank balance... This is an illusion. One day our earthly journey will end and the prince and pauper will stand side by side. We live to gain and grow from experience, and that is all, Materialism is a mere distraction.

We all face difficult circumstances from time to time, it's life's problems and how we handle them that teach us. Ask yourself what you can do about what's troubling you. What you can do, simply do. What lies beyond your control you must, by definition, accept and make the best of.

The future

Uncertainty is a fact of life. The future is unknown. It doesn't yet exist, because we, collectively, create the future with our actions in the present. Yet at times we become overwhelmed with thoughts of how bad things might turn out.

We need to think about the future in terms of how we'd like it to be. This allows us to create a strategy for the present. All we can do to make the future the way we want is getting our actions right in the present.

So once we've decided our destination and set the course we need to draw a mental veil over the future. Doing our best is all we can do, and if we do that we need have no worries over the future. Those worries will probably still try to come in, but armed with this knowledge we can keep them locked out and keep our focus where we can best use it - the present.

The world

If God is good how come there's so much suffering in the world? To answer this we must consider the reason the physical realm exists at all. It is for Spirit (ie us) to grow from experience, and the only way you get experience is by doing (experiencing) stuff.

Just as you can get to be a surgeon or pilot sitting in a class room so Spirit can't grow without direct experience. Sometimes what happens will be cruel, extreme, but considered against the infinite backdrop of eternity it is mere detail.

That's not to say we should switch off to global problems, indeed we should be aware and offer our assistance in whatever way we can. But whatever we do problems will remain. Be a conscientious member of society, but never lose sight of the bigger picture.

Kindness

"It's better to give than to receive." Self help expert Dr Wayne Dyer says: "The beneficial effects of kindness on the immune system and the increased production of serotonin have been proven." Try showing random acts of kindness to strangers, it can be as simple as holding doors open for others, giving directions, handing loose change to homeless people, or just offering a friendly word or smile.

How to Stop Feeling Bad

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